Now that the Stigs identity has been revealed the only hope for the McCanns is that Maddie is the banker off deal or no deal.

I love to have sex with a bird that has Tourette's, it makes my neighbours think I'm great in bed!

A retired old sailor puts on his old uniform heads for the docks once more for old times sake, engages a prostitute, takes her to his room, he’s going at it as well as he can for a man his age, but needing some reassurance he asks how am I doing?” Prostitute replies well old sailor yr doing 3 knots… 3 knots he asks? She sez yeah – your not hard, your not in & your not getting your money back!

Originally Posted by davejjuk2006

A retired old sailor puts on his old uniform heads for the docks once more for old times sake, engages a prostitute, takes her to his room, he’s going at it as well as he can for a man his age, but needing some reassurance he asks how am I doing?” Prostitute replies well old sailor yr doing 3 knots… 3 knots he asks? She sez yeah – your not hard, your not in & your not getting your money back!

good one haha

David Cameron has said that at least his dad got to see his grandchild before he died.

Well, he's about to see his other grandchild now.

---------- Post added Friday 10th September 2010 at 00:00 ---------- Previous post was Thursday 9th September 2010 at 23:21 ----------

Anti-Islamics call Mohammed a paedophile for taking six-year-old Ayesha as a wife but, to be fair, she was a Paki so that made her 42 in dog years.

I took my dog down to the dole office and asked what benefits he was entitled to. Bloke behind the counter said "We don't give benefits to dogs!" I said "Why not? He's black, he smells, he's never worked and he doesn't speak English!"
His first payment is next Monday!

Originally Posted by superally

I took my dog down to the dole office and asked what benefits he was entitled to. Bloke behind the counter said "We don't give benefits to dogs!" I said "Why not? He's black, he smells, he's never worked and he doesn't speak English!"
His first payment is next Monday!

best joke ive heard in ages

Originally Posted by jcasper

best joke ive heard in ages

sadly it would probs be true. ah well.

what do you call a paki elvis impersonator ahmal shukup

---------- Post added at 21:34 ---------- Previous post was at 20:35 ----------

a woman say to her husband i want bigger tits what shall i do he replies push them into settee for 18 hours a day she said will that work he said it has on your arse

A young man walked up and sat down at the bar. "What can I get you?" the bartender inquired.

"I want 6 shots of Jagermeister," responded the young man.

"6 shots?!? Are you celebrating something?"

"Yeah, my first blowjob," the man answered.

"Well, in that case, let me give you a 7th on the house."

"No offense, sir. But if 6 shots won't get rid of the taste, nothing will."

reports say george michael has been so inspired by his cell mate that he is going to re-release his classic song "careless whisper" but changing the title to "hairless fister!"

Originally Posted by jcasper

A young man walked up and sat down at the bar. "What can I get you?" the bartender inquired.

"I want 6 shots of Jagermeister," responded the young man.

"6 shots?!? Are you celebrating something?"

"Yeah, my first blowjob," the man answered.

"Well, in that case, let me give you a 7th on the house."

"No offense, sir. But if 6 shots won't get rid of the taste, nothing will."

Good one lol, sometimes i'm afraid to look into this thread, I don;t know what to expect!!

Originally Posted by boro_boy

Good one lol, sometimes i'm afraid to look into this thread, I don;t know what to expect!!

Fair one, it does get a bit close to the bone, But hey it's the bad taste thread, so all is good.
got to be one of the longest running active threads on here.

I went round my mate's house yesterday and his kids were running round the house screaming.

He looked at me and said, "Don't ever have kids mate."

I said, "Hard work?"

He said, "No, you're an ugly cun't.

If anyone tells you that deforestation is ruining an animal's natural habitat, just remind them that shaving pubes destroys crab lice's natural habitat, but you don't see anybody protesting that.

That Steven Hawkins must get some decent disability benefit.

Every time i see him, he always has a nice clean pair of new shoes on.